“Self-love is not selfish; you cannot truly love another until you know to love yourself” – anonymous
One of my favorite quote, which actually I can relate on. There were times in the past that I felt worthless, that anything I do was nothing but a junk. I was afraid to make mistakes because I always considered what others might think about me. I tend to be more considerate to other people’s taste rather than mine. Always saying that I’m fine though it’s not. I pretended to be strong, whereas I’m weak within. Finding hard for me to opened up my feelings even to those who are close to me because I feared burdening them with my own problems. I struggled trusting others and reluctant to express my true emotions because I didn’t want to be judged. Most of the times, I was being too hard on myself. I developed the fear of being hurt, therefore it became hard for me to love sincerely.
But that was me before. As I get older, I gradually change the way I think of my self and I became emotionally matured enough to understand and accept the real me. Accepting the reality that I cannot please everybody. I stopped criticizing my self, instead became gentle in the sense of not compromising myself in setting up high standards. I learned how to appreciate myself, even the weakest part of mine. I started to accept the fact that it’s just normal to make mistakes and what matters most is that I learned from that fault, nobody’s perfect anyway. I am trying to be kind and more generous to myself. I own myself and nobody should be prouder of the progress I have, but only me. I am also in the process of accepting the failures I had in the past and move forward. Starting to give my love unconditionally to others as how I love myself. And I’ll try to keep on fighting to find my own happiness I deserve.